the further adventures of

Mike Pirnat

a leaf on the wind

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Endorsement Form

So if you want to go to a Bush/Cheney event to see what their platform is about, you are required to sign an endorsement form in order to get your ticket to attend.

By itself, this really bothers, irritates, and upsets me. No matter how strongly I feel about a candidate, any candidate, I'm not going to be the jackass who goes just to heckle. I might actually like a chance to hear the candidate in person before I make up my mind about them. I should not have to swear loyalty just to get in the door. This is not what a democracy--not even a republic!--is about.

But wait, there's more--deliciously, hilariously, brain-hurtingly more:

An endorsement form provided to the Journal by Random says: "I, (full name) ... do herby (sic) endorse George W. Bush for reelection of the United States."

Um. Er. Excuse me... Whatthefuck?!? I mean, seriously, if you're going to make people sign the form, can it at least be spell-checked, or looked over by someone with more than a small handful of brain cells? If I'm going to have to sign away my allegiance in some sickly display of Orwellian pageantry, I'd like the form to be at least marginally coherent. GOP folks, can we at least meet halfway on this one?

If anyone can dig up a scan of the actual form, I would love to immortalize that for posterity. I dug around for a while but didn't turn anything up.

Back to being angry again. I just read this. Grr.

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Induce THIS, Senator Asshat!

Sounds like RIAA has managed to purchase sufficient support in the Senate for the so-called INDUCE Act... Don't want to give up your VCR? Can't live without your Tivo? Don't like the RIAA raping your mother, spitting in your food, and kicking your dog? The EFF can help you! (Or so I would like to think.)

I wonder what real estate prices are like in Canada... (They do still have "freedom" up there, right?)

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Tell the Man Where to Stick It

This just in from those lovable liberal loonies at I don't pass along much of their chatter, but I hadn't realized that this was coming to a vote so soon. Please read what they have to say, and act with your conscience, whatever your opinion.

Congress is about to vote on amending the U.S. Constitution to deny marriage equality to same-sex couples.

Never before has our Constitution been amended to take away anyone's rights. Yet our Senators will vote on this amendment in the next 48 hours.

It's urgent that we speak up now. This hateful divisiveness has no place in America. Please join me in saying so, at:

Equality in marriage is the civil rights issue of our generation. We can't let anyone, or any group, be singled out for discrimination based on who they are or who they love.

Thank you.

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Straight But Not Narrow

President Bush wants to defend marriage through a Constitutional amendment? That says that not all men are created equal, that refutes the tenet that all citizens should have equal protection under the law?

If he really wants to protect the institution of marriage, then why don't we drop all the discriminatory rhetoric and do something that will actually get the job done. It would be far more effective to simply outlaw divorce or make adultery a federal crime.

And exactly whose marriage is at risk if two people of the same gender want to spend their lives within the bond of a commited, loving, stable relationship? Is the Gay Marriage Enforcer Squad going to come and take you away from your spouse and press you into kinky gay servitude? If two other people's loving, monogamous relationship threatens your marriage, then you and your spouse are probably (over)due for some counseling.

In a hundred years, history will look back on the "marriage defenders" the way we now look back on those that would deny women the vote, or that would enslave those with different skin. The President's pursuit of the Constitutional process on this issue is reckless and foolhardy, and will cement his tenure in the White House as a time of shame for our nation.

Marriage is love.
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Thank You, Patriot Act!

I missed's webcast of their "Bush in 30 Seconds" shin-dig, but finally did get a chance to see all of the finalists.

While there were some not-very-good ones in the 1500+ that were submitted, some pretty impressive ads came out of the contest as well. Many, especially (most of) the finalists, are worth your time to check out. Particularly good were "Child's Play", "In My Country", "Polygraph", "What Are We Teaching Our Children", "Human Cost of War", "Desktop" (for you fellow Mac geeks), "Bankrupt", "Bush's Repair Shop", "Pop Quiz", "Al Keyda", and "Bring It On".

I was also amused by the concept of "If the Bush Administration Was Your Roommate", but it needed a little more zing than it had.

Oh, and since it seems to be the meme du jour...

I am an Intellectual

Which America Hating Minority Are You?

Take More Robert & Tim Quizzes
Watch Robert & Tim Cartoons

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The Big Day

The big day is finally upon us; Andy and Lauren are finally getting married!

Yesterday was the rehearsal dinner on the River Walk. It was a bit crazy, but everyone had a good time. I took a bunch of photos, some of them good, some of them less good; they're online now, but I haven't had time to rotate or post-process them yet. (You will just have to live.) I lost track of how many margaritas I had -- people just kept handing them to me -- so I ended up good and marinated by the end of the evening, which made for some seriously wacked-out dreams.

When Andy graduated from college, Liz gave him "Dating for Dummies" and "Sex for Dummies" as somewhat of a gag gift. Since at least the first volume has proven to be successful (I don't want to even know about the second one's influence!), Liz and I gave Andy a copy of the inevitable third volume in the series, Making Marriage Work for Dummies. (On a side note, I have to say that I'm rather disturbed by the wide array of subject matter addressed by the "For Dummies" books. Maybe they could print up some "Foreign Policy for Dummies" or "How Not to Tank the Economy for Dummies" and send them up W's way? But I digress...)

Today, we'll get all spiffed up and head out to The Salt Lick for the game-day rehearsal, ceremony and the reception. Congratulations again to the bride and groom on their big day! Dare I say it... w00t!!!:-)

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Good With the Bad

Things that are bad:

  • Being super-crazy-busy at work.
  • One fiasco after another at work.
  • One fiasco after another at my wife's workplace.
  • Having to pay sales tax on haircuts.
  • Having to pay sales tax on my DirecTV bill.
  • Having to pay sales tax on all kinds of asinine things. Hey, UP YOURS, GOVERNOR TAFT! Way to stimulate Ohio's economy by giving me less money to spend on Ohio business. Asshat. When the heck are we gonna vote this kook out of office?
  • Massive papercuts on one's tongue -- curse you, Citibank envelope of Hades!!
  • Being up too late.
  • Being too tired to work out.
  • Not having time/energy enough to post much.

Things that are good:

  • New carpet...still!
  • Working out, when I've not been up too late.
  • I got the Matrox framebuffer tweaked all (mostly) nice! I have a very pretty text console! La-de-flipping-da!
  • Mmm, good cooking lately.
  • Hey, we've got TOMATOES! And they're bright red, perfectly ripe, and damnably delicious! (Quite lovely with a spot of salt, pepper, olive oil, basil, and balsamic vingear... mmmmmmm....)
  • Geek porn, aka the latest Mac World magazine (lots of pretty pictures of Panther and the new G5's, *drool*)
  • Dealing mercilessly with work fiascos and emerging victorious, huzzah! Bask in my issue-resolving glory!
  • Having a creative out-of-office auto-reply message.
  • Dad's Bose noise-cancelling headphones... though I am enough sold on them that maybe I should recategorize them as "bad things."
  • Being on VACATION!
  • Road trip to Canada, starting tomorrow, to go see lots of plays. (Remember last year? I do!)
  • Other things too numerous to mention.... yeah.
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Gosh. I can't quite put my finger on it, but I am feeling pretty damn low for some reason. Sort of like being spiritually kicked in the nuts. I have no drive to do anything, and I'd be pretty much satisfied if the world just all went away for awhile.

I wonder, is this just a post-winter/early-springtime generic malaise, or something more? I suspect that my borderline addiction to the news isn't helping, now that NPR, CNN, MSNBC, and Google News have launched a massive assault on my senses. Is it the occasional, inexplicable weirdness I am seeing from my car? Does it have something to do with waking up on February 1 to the news of Columbia? Am I still hurting from the departure of Mr. Rogers from this mortal coil? Maybe I've got unresolved feelings about Grandma and Grandpa both dying this winter. Maybe it's the still-lingering traces of guilt I feel about how my fuzzy little Nala left the world, so small and helpless and stupidly tragic.

I just have this feeling like, with a few exceptions, the entire world is systematically going horribly, horribly awry. I have this sick feeling in my stomach wherever I go, and I just can't seem to shake it.

To borrow a phrase from everybody's favorite angst-monkey, Trent Reznor, I want to do something that matters. I want to find something that I enjoy doing, and do it. I want to be a part of something meaningful. I want real relationships with friends again, not just the stimulus/response of the glowing screen and online journals. I want to see people, and do things, go places, and have some fun before the world goes completely to hell.

I guess what I'm trying to say is:

Does anybody here remember Vera Lynn ?
Remember how she said that
We would meet again
Some sunny day
Vera ! Vera !
What has become of you ?
Does anybody else in here
Feel the way I do ?

- Pink Floyd, "Vera", The Wall

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And Lest Gary Be Forgot...

we are so fragile
advertising lies that are whiter than yours
we are so fragile
they could give us a war just to keep us amused

we are so fragile
i could stay here inside and say it's all been done
we are so fragile
just pretend i never tried i leave it up to you

we are still so young
and it must be wrong but i'd do it all the same
and we are really so shy
there's nothing i can do but believe in this

we could always go home
but everyone says this is the place to be
we are so unnatural
but you wouldn't understand, you only deal with men

Gary Numan, "We Are So Fragile", B-side of "Are 'Friends' Electric?"

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